A reality show has infringed upon my life I


The other day while browsing through a thrift store, a nauseating voice came from the radio.

This time he’s giving a speech in front of NATO; I cringe at the notion that he has a microphone that reaches through continents. But life continues. My excuse for entering the thrift store today: I really should find a gift for my partner. I browse the men’s section. If only they had a Deadpool shirt. And in my imagination the local thrift shop has the possibility of having everything. I end up moving to the women’s section where I find a bluish, gray top with a modern neckline that is only four dollars. I hold it like a treasure then head to the kitchen section. Maybe, he would like a mug, but I think no, he has plenty. What about spoons? I eventually find myself face to face with rows of pale blue and white teacups sitting on their inseparable tiny plates. I don’t think he’ll have any use for this. But, I could still buy it for myself? No! I have enough teacups. I quickly walk out to the fitting room then to the cash register before I give myself the chance to make another excuse to stay here today. I go back to biking in the hellish hours of three in the afternoon when the sun is so heavy you forget why you’re out here in the first place. The next day it drizzles. It’s the sky tempting you with fresh rain. The next day there are termites outside of Walgreen. It must be termite season. Go back to checking your compost, which still doesn’t look right. I’m being insensitive to these worms by feeding them onions. I try a new bread recipe to arrive at the most anticipated part: kneading the dough. This dough is still too sticky. Damn it! Oh right, I forget to be patient. Checking twitter again, frustrated, you start contemplating other “most embarrassing moments in U.S. history” only to arrive at the words “legitimized by the government.” Sometimes funny writings or videos make you laugh at stupid watergate, while at the same time getting realizing there’s a new budget proposal. Really? Not the Special Olympics! Not Planned Parenthood! In awe that some senators and congress representatives are raising their voices, with the words RIDICULOUS in bold, and I will not stand for it! You leave voice messages and Facebook comments to deaf ears. “It’s best to write a letter. It’s always best to write about your experience, your worries.” I’m in a red state after all, but a blue city. We’re not like Montana where if you’re a journalist asking about the CBO report you get pummeled, and the final line is, “You broke my glasses.” Sometimes you miss home, but you find strangers that practice Spanish with you. The other night I met a dog, named Tesla, and I wore a green toga to a Greek festival.